Local: Think global, eat elsewhere.

Local opened just a few months ago in the former location of an antique shop. The owner was once a cook at Cobras and Matadors and thought that, since the antique business wasn't doing too well, he might as well try his hand at a restaurant. I had actually been there when it was an antique store, and I have to say...

...it was better as an antique store

Local has an interesting set up, since it works basically like a fast food restaurant. You walk inside and order at the counter, then take your number and find a seat, which is offered on the side patio, or out in front on the sidewalk.



You may also get your own salad from the salad bar, but neither Number One Diner Companion Antoinette nor I ordered salads.



We both got coffee, though and were excited by the gargantuan mugs. We took our mugs to the coffee fixin's station and I was impressed to see real simple syrup available. We were sorely disappointed to find the coffee was bitter and had an odd chemical aftertaste.



I ordered a crepe with red bell pepper, sausage, jack cheese and onions. It came with home fries and toast. Now, the home fries were good and no one can ruin toast, short of burning. The crepe was uneven with the top half consisting of nothing but pepper and onions and the bottom being where the sausage and cheese was hiding. Overall it was decent--just decent.



Antoinette ordered the brioche french toast with yogurt and fruit. It was a nice blend of fruit, but terribly bland. Their local supplier definitely picked before the pique of ripeness. The yogurt was fine: unsweeetened and unflavored. The french toast, however, was nearly inedible. I like soggy french toast. I like the bread to have soaked up the batter like the military industrial complex soaks up our national budget. I'm not saying I can't enjoy it if isn't sopping wet, I just have a preference. This french toast was barely 'kissed' by the batter, and the batter it was kissed with was foul. After three bites, Antoinette felt nauseous and gave up.



I attempted to finish my meal, but it was hopeless. We couldn't even force ourselves to gulp down the remaining $3 coffee.


There is really nothing to make me recommend Local. Yes, the idea of local ingredients, farmers market goods, blahblahblah is all well and good, but there are a lot of places that do this already--and do it well. In a world with Auntie Em's, Madame Matisse, and Square 1, there is just no reason to dine Local.

Food: Not so great.
Service: You serve yourself, although they do come around with coffee refills. I doubt anyone takes them up on the offer, though.
Price: Far too expensive. $32.00 for two moderately portioned, barely edible breakfasts and bad coffee. No. Just no.
Pie: None.

2943 W. Sunset Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90026
(323) 662-4740

Special thanks to our friend Dan Koeppel for the inside information on Local's back story. Visit his website: http://www.bananabook.org

On the Road Update: We've lost a good one.

I just found out that Vancouver Washington's Stardust Diner closed at the begining of the month.

Read my review of it from last year and mourn the passing of one of the good ones.

Stardust Diner

Stevie Dee's Cafe - Shake the Shack.

We found it by accident. Number One Diner Companion Antoinette says she's probably driven past it a hundred times. While looking for a place to get dinner, we searched "new Rancho Cucamonga restaurants" and stumbled upon this place, Stevie Dee's Cafe. Formerly known as
Chuck's Diner, the name change is, I'm sure, how it came up as a result for "new" restaurants.



Stevie Dee's Cafe is a shack by the railroad tracks. It's a "50's Diner," which usually means enough kitsch to make you throw up your chotskies. As soon as you walk inside, ou know the place is going to be an experience; there are innumerable pictures of Elvis and Marilyn everywhere. Elvis as a cowboy, Elvis as a soldier, Elvis as your barber, Elvis as your mom. And Marilyn as...well, Marilyn.



Like in most--scratch that--ALL 50's diners, there is a collection of Coca-Cola merchandise for sale. Why is this a trope of this style of diner? If anything, Pepsi is more of a icon from the 50s. 50's diners are all about an odd nostalgia for the pop culture of the time. Coke's never left the consciousness of the culture so it can't be dated to a specific time. Never has the Pepsi brand been so heavily pushed as it was in the 1950s. PepsiCo had Joan Crawford and a giant monkey-man hawking it, for Pete's sake! Why does Coca-Cola have such a lock down on nostalgia?



I'll be the first to say; I like that 50's kitsch. I went through my rockabilly phase and have the pomade to prove it. Growing up, my older sister went through a phase where we actually redecorated her bedroom to look like a 1950's malt shop--black and white tile and all. I have my James Dean, Elvis, Marilyn, Brando in "The Wild One", 'Chantilly Lace,' and 'Pink Carnation and a Pickup Truck' pedigree. I can also see how that kind of environment might provide an annoying dining experience. What saves Stevie Dee's Cafe is that this building looks and feels really...old.



It's a folksy charm place, with a 'well-gosh-darn-it, we're going to make due with what we got attitude.' It's old without being decrepit. Its out of the way location (not being by an off ramp or a shopping center) makes me imagine it as a "locals only" establishment where a fella could just disappear into a new identity, forget all the wrong he's done, and start living right with God.

We sat down at our table and pulled our the menus from the little holder on the table. Glancing through them, we were surprised at how cheap everything was. The most expensive item on the menu was the T-bone and eggs, as $8.99. The cheapest, coffee at 99 cents. You don't get 99 cent coffee anywhere and it was better than I've had at most run of the mill joints.

Although our waitress recommended the french toast, I settled on an old fashioned pancake breakfast ($5.99) while Number One Diner Companion Antoinette went with the Breakfast Special ($3.99).



This is a spread of food, all for 4 bucks. The eggs, like mine, were dangerously close to 'too wet.' Antoinette thought they were good, and she's the discerning one. The home fries were thin cut slices of potato browned with just a hint of green pepper, and just greasy enough to be good. While the biscuit itself was unspectacular, the gravy was excellent: peppery and not too heavy, with large chunks of real sausage soaking in it. I wish the sausage they used in the gravy was what they served with the breakfast specials.



The whole ensemble was exactly what you'd expect. The pancakes were regular ol' restaurant pancakes. The eggs were eggs. The bacon was crispy like it should be. The breakfast links were fine, but I've finally come to terms with the sad reality; I have lost my taste for breakfast links. What are terrible state to be in for a diner reviewer! Alas, here I am.

The servers were all over us. I'd take two sips of my coffee and a guy would be there to refill it. Our waitress must have asked us a dozen times if we needed anything else and/or how we were doing. On our way out, we noticed a hand written sign by the door apologizing if the food took too long and for any other inconvenience, and that they phone orders were welcome, to speed up the lunchtime rush. Afterward, as I was looking at the Yelp review for Stevie Dee's, I noted that some had commented about the service being lack-luster. They were clearly trying to turn things around; our food arrived quickly, and the service was nothing less than solicitious.

You'll want to note that the parking lot is pretty small, and if the lot ever gets full, I have no idea where you could park nearby. Luckily, this is a hidden away place and I can't imagine it ever gets over-crowded.

On weekends they are only open until 3pm but during the week they stay open until 7:30pm for dinner.

Stevie Dee's Cafe was a nice find and I wholeheartedly recommend it.

Food: Good.
Service: Very Attentive.
Price: $4-$8
Pie: No. They do have home-made cookies, cake, and serve frozen ice cream treatslike the ones the ice cream man sells.

Stevie Dee's Cafe
8890 8th St, Rancho Cucamonga, CA 91730-4304 (Map)
Phone: (909) 608-0260

Joanne's Cafe - Slashing Prices!

Once again out in the wilds East of Los Angeles, I accidentally stumbled onto Joanne's Cafe. It was clearly an old building with a newer restaurant inside--the classic A-frame building with a vinyl banner for a sign is always a tell-tale sign. After doing a bit of research, I discovered that it was once a pie place...perhaps even a member of the House of Pies family of restaurants.



Inside, I was shocked at the odd pastels and spring time colors that decorated the interior. It was almost off-putting with its cheeriness. It reminded me of when I was a kid and my local McDonalds switched to a southwest deserty theme. I wanted the Hamburgular and Grimace, not taupe and turquoise paintings on the wall.




Now I have to say, I am Grade-A *over* the shameless advertising that the Belgian Waffle receives at every breakfast joint nowadays. The Belgian waffle is the Miley Cyrus of breakfasts. Who pays for these ads? It's fascinating to me. Is it Belgium? Is it the NWA (National Waffle Assosciation)? Is there a National Waffle Association? If not, why not?

I was seated near the back of the restaurant by the emergency exit. An old couple waved good-bye to the front counter and exited through said emergency exit, which struck me as a little odd. A little while later, another elderly couple went out the same way. There didn't really seem to be a reason for it, as the front entrance and the emergency exit both emptied into the parking lot. My theory: old people don't give a ****.

So the first thing you are going to notice when you look at the menu are the prices. Seriously, these are probably the lowest menu prices that I've ever seen at a restaurant where not only is there a waitress but an actual roof on the building. The average meal price is five dollars, and there is nothing over ten dollars.

I ordered about as standard a breakfast as I could imagine: hash browns, eggs, and sausage breakfast. For my choice of bread, I ordered the zucchini bread. Not a normal offering for a breakfast bread, but if they have that as a choice, it must be something they are proud of.



My food came out super fast. Like scary fast. After taking my first bite, it became clear that it was not efficiency that brought my food to me. My eggs were undercooked and my hash browns were mushy. The zucchini bread was soft and warm and quite good. However, I would never say "You gotta try the zucchini bread." If you ordered it, I'd say "Oh yeah, it's good." It just didn't stand out as wonderful. Halfway through my meal, my stomach started to rebel. I couldn't finish.

Now I will say that the sandwiches I saw on other people's tables all looked really good, so maybe the sandwiches are the way to go at Joanne's.

On my way out, I had to stop at the fish tank.



I like fish tanks at two kinds of restaurants: Chinese restaurants and restaurants I don't go to.

Joanne's Cafe is the kind of place you go knowing it won't be anything more than "good enough," and at those prices I can see why people would be willing to go, despite the low-quality.


Food: Not so good.
Service: Adequate.
Price: $4-8
Pie: None! NONE!


Joanne's Cafe
1141 N. Mountain Ave.
Ontario, CA

Spare some change for the Nickel Diner

I recieved a hot tip about a new diner opening up in downtown. Okay, it wasn't a real "hot tip." It was diner pal Paul forwarding me an article from an LA website about the opening. I knew that I had to go on the first day because how often do you get to go to a place on it's opening day? I've never experienced it, but I can imagine there's excitement, maybe some headaches and potential disappointment, but also potential amazement. It's a lot like the first time you have sex...with another person...or with yourself for that matter.


The Nickel Diner opened for its first shift on August 27th in one of those areas of downtown that's getting gentrified, but only jussssst barely starting the process. Imagine the area around venerable Los Angeles cafeteria, Clifton's, without the glitz of the jewelry district but with all the goodness of the homeless.

Joining me this time were #1 Diner Companion Antoinette and #1 Coworker Eveleen. Technically speaking, I crashed their lunch plans and convinced them to go to The Nickel. We lucked into parking right in front. A Meth head perched near the entrance provided us some parking advice when we encountered a broken parking meter,
"Don't worry, they don't bother checking." It was almost like valet!


The street locals did seem cautiously curious of this new eatery in their midst. Many of them would stop and gaze at the delicious looking baked goods in the window. None, though, even seemed to consider going in.




Arriving there at about 2 pm, I was pleased to see a healthy crowd still eating. Unless the waitstaff were total d-bags and the cooks put AIDS infected needles in the vegan tapioca, I want a place like this to succeed. I love diners of all stripes, even the nouveau diners, which The Nickel definitely embodies.

So the first of two headaches hit us pretty quickly. The menu implores you (with its placement and catchy name) to order the S'mac and Cheese (spicy with three cheeses, topped with tomato and bread crumbs). The waitress confirmed that the name was meant as a joke based on the neighborhood. The gals wanted to go splitsies on it and then the waitress had to say "Yeaaaa... we actually don't have that today."




The BBQ pork hash and eggs was probably the most old-school diner thing I could get on the menu by the early afternoon. (Pancakes stop being served at 11). It was a good choice: familiar, but with enough of a twist with the BBQ sauce and the seasonings that I felt like I was getting something brand new. I was a little disappointed with the portion. It was a reasonable portion. I am not going to lie. I like to have to make a choice about whether or not to clean my plate. I was left hungry. Luckily, I had some other delectable things to graze on.

The girls did go splitsies on some items.




The stuffed avocado couldn't be any more frou frou. It had quinoa in it. *I* only know what quinoa is because I bought an "Archer Farms" box dinner version of it from Target. It's like cous cous. I still don't have any idea how to say it. The avocado was not something I'd ever order on my own, but it was exceptionally good. I'm glad the gals got it: flavorful combination of red peppers, black beans, corn, and quinoa made this a hearty salad option.



They also got the chicken salad sandwich on wheat. I love chicken salad and although this was good, it didn't seem up the level of culinary detail I was begining to expect as part of the Nickel Diner's plan. I imagine it will go through some refinement.

The french fries were beyond belief. Thin cut, but not overly crispy, with a great flavored salt. I am going to make a "top 10 fries of all time" list, just so I can put these on it.

We were treated to a lovely display of the desserts available and even got to sample the maple glazed donut with bacon pieces (real bacon not the stuff you put on salads) sprinkled on top. Bacon and maple syrup are two things that need to be combined much more often in this world.

At this point, the second headache appeared: the credit card machine was not working and it was cash only. After trying to pool our cash and realizing we'd come up short, I jaunted out into the world to find an ATM. I lucked into finding one two blocks away in a liquor store where weird old men watched me suspiciously.

One week later, the three of us returned to see how things were going. The good news is that they seemed to be going well. We had the same waitress and asked about how business had been. She said steady and that they had gotten slammed over the weekend. I'm glad they are doing brisk business.

This time I ordered the polenta with chicken apple sausage and maple syrup.



I wasn't really sure what to expect. I had only ever had fried polenta before. This blew me away. Easily my favorite thing so far at the Nickel, I think I could eat this for breakfast at least twice a week.



The girls were finally able to get the S'mac and Cheese. Antoinette didn't feel like the three cheeses blended very well and just made a strange flavor--not necessarily a good or even an interesting one. The amount of bread crumb crust was a bit much.



Now the grilled cheese sandwich won the blue ribbon from the gals: "Phenom!" Roasted tomato and mozarella, perfectly grilled. I will note they also have another grilled cheese option with cheddar, bacon and tomato.

Still having some room for a dessert, we decided to peruse the dessert tray. Typically, I was inclined to get the delicious looking meringue, but the Berry White Cake could not be ignored.



Loyal readers will know that I am a hardcore pie man, but even I will admit that there are cakes that look like works of sugar art make kissy faces at your eyes. More often than not, they fail to actually do the same to your tastebuds. This one actually delivers on the visual promise with a deep and long perfect blend of everything from the amount of fruit, the thickness of the frosting to the amount of actual cake.

I'm very glad to have a diner near my day job so I can have easy access to my favorite style of food. An extra bonus is that this place is spectacularly good.

The only bummer: they still hadn't fixed the credit card machine.

Food: Super Great.
Service: Friendly.
Price: 8-14
Pie: Lemon Meringue (plus other desserts)

524 Main Street
Los Angeles CA
The website

Dinerwood on the Road: Keith's is now Aunt Emma's?- San Diego

Update 7-28-10: In this modern world, sometimes things change. The bottom becomes the top, what was right is now wrong, your aunt becomes your uncle, your uncle becomes your aunt.
Keith's in now an Aunt Emma's.





Original review-
Dammit, Keith make up your mind! Are you a restaurant or a coffee shop?

Either way though, you're pretty cool.

Last year when I was in San Diego for (NERD!) Comic Con, I saw the sign for Keith's from the freeway several times but never had the chance to stop. This year, however, I made it an agenda item to hit this place.

Keith's is something like a chain with two locations in the San Diego area. Number 1 Diner Companion Antoinette, her brother, Diner Lad Alex, and I hit the one in south San Diego off the 5 freeway. Technically it is in National City. It's kind of weird to have a town named National City so close to an international border. Seems almost hostile.



Keith's is a locals place. Neighborhood folks walk over for breakfast or stop here after church. Because it's this kind of place, you'll find a homey charm and a genuine friendliness to the staff. I will say that at 9am on Sunday it wasn't very crowded. Was it a sign? We were sure we liked the atmosphere but atmosphere does not equal quality of food.

And of course, they have a crane machine by the door. #1DC Antoinette noted that the claw was too loose to really grab anything. Save your dollars.

Regular readers will remember that I go ga-ga over places that start off with a coffee mug on the table and all you have to do is turn it over to indicate your desire for coffee. Keith's does this. And their coffee has a nice mellow flavor. Diner Lad Alex ordered the hot chocolate and said "This is the best hot chocolate in the world....at least at the bottom." He's 13, he doesn't like anything, but he likes the bottom... of this hot chocolate. A lot. They gave him a hot chocolate refill for free, which was great and rare for any restaurant.



He also liked his simple bacon and cheese omelet.



I ordered the biscuits and gravy with one egg and hash browns. It didn't blow me away, but it was good. Walking in, I knew the food at it's best would be "good." I was just glad it wasn't awful. At this point Keith's was just so enjoyable, I didn't want it ruined by the food.



#1DC Antoinette was especially hungry this morning and went with eggs (scrambled well), bacon and an apple and cinnamon waffle. She was really impressed with the waffle. It's far more common to have a disappointing waffle.

The pie was served warm and had delicious flaky crust (I'm not usually a fan of flaky crust) but it did get mushy toward the bottom. I liked that I could tell that the apple cinnamon from the waffle was not the same recipe as for the pie.



Keith's was a no unnecessary frills, comfortable place. You're not going to get any surprises here--well unless you manage to get something out of that crane machine. You'll have a decent meal in a friendly environment, along with some good coffee.


UPDATE-

I saw the sign from the freeway and thought- "Whoa- I don't remember being able to see an Aunt Emma's sign from here...now where's the Keith's sign...Ohhhh.. Oh." My fears were confirmed when we drove up.

I asked the waitress how long it had been since the change-over and she said almost a year exactly. So basically right after the last time we ate there.



Greg ordered a Monte Cristo. The sandwich was good, but didn't come with any jam. He used the strawberry syrup in its place and that made up for it. The hashbrowns were not every good, not crispy and cold on the inside.



I ordered the special which was "bisteak ranchito." It was chunks of steak in a pico de gallo like sauce with re-fried beans, an egg and tortillas. It was really awesome, quality chunks of meat and really flavorful.

Food: Good.
Service: Good.
Price 6-12
Pie: Yes. -UPDATE- NO pie!

214 National City Blvd,
National City, CA -
(619) 477-4358‎

Teahouse Coffee Shop - Imperial Palace, Las Vegas. Why was I here?

Vegas is not my friend. Last time I was here, it robbed me a of a month's rent. This time, it kept me up for 24 hours straight. At 7 am, half drunk and wandering the Imperial Palace casino floor, I was the last of my tribe in sight. Not terribly hungry but needing food, I searched for the sign that would tell where to go to get some food-- Teahouse Coffee Shop. A coffee shop? An opportunity to make it mean something to be up this late... this early?

I staggered, out of exhaustion, not inebriation, to the escalator and took immense pleasure in not having to move for the ride up. I stood by the entrance for moment before I startled the hostess with my presence. Apparently my staggering was stealthy. This woman would not survive the zombie apocalypse. Despite the hour, the staff was all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. I guess they hadn't been in the Mai Tai bar off the lobby since midnight.

Maybe it was just me, but I couldn't tell what they were going for decor wise. It's at the Imperial Palace, which is Asian themed (it vacillates between Chinese and Japanese) and the place is called the Teahouse Coffee Shop...there's a lot going on there. Basically what you get is a pastel-ly, strip-mall looking Japanese restaurant that doesn't serve Japanese food but rather American diner favorites.

I call this face "Uggh."



So first thing I did after sitting was order a coffee. I then inquired if they had any breakfast specials. I had just missed the cheapo Vegas-style full meal for 6.99 by 30 minutes. I ordered the Silver State Skillet. Two eggs served over a "casserole" of sausage, pork and bacon on a bed of hash browns. It sounded like such a good idea. That's a gang of pig!

First the coffee came...straight from the pit of hell. This was the hottest cup of coffee I had ever been in uncomfortable proximity to. Was it good, though? No idea! It was so hot I could barely sip it. It seemed weak though. I guess casinos don't like you to be alert.

Then the food came. Awww, a flower. That's precious.



The food sounded like a good idea. In truth, the food was fine. Nothing special, nothing to recommend. It's a Vegas casino breakfast. It put food in me and it didn't come back to haunt me.


The only disappointing thing were the "biscuits." They sucked. Get a load of the scale of these tiny dust-tasting things. Almost 3 bucks for that. I got a better return on my investment of three bucks into the video poker machine that I randomly pressed buttons on for a minute before I crapped out.

Food: Meh.
Service: Friendly.
Price: $7-20 (it's Vegas)
Pie: Nope.

3535 Las Vegas Blvd. South
Las Vegas, Nevada

UPDATE!

Imperial Palace Teahouse Coffee Shop is now a Hash House A-Go-Go.

Still not that good.


The interior is completely remolded to fit in with the Hash House A-Go-Go aesthetic.



The food is still presentation over quality. Although, I do really like their biscuits. That right there is an improvement over the previous version of the restaurant.